It is so easy these days to browse through potential dates. You can order up a slice of “hot guy pie” as easily as ordering Seamless. What used to be just waiting for the bus is now prime time to see what lovely lasses lurk nearby. Whether you’re looking for Mr./Ms. Right or Mr./Ms. Right Now, you’ll want to make sure that none of these red flags pop up or it’s left swipe for you!
If you’re a guy, even if you have awesome abs, please refrain from take the ubiquitous shirtless mirror selfie. Women are inundated with men trying to show off and frankly, they are sick of it. If you’ve got a great bod, use a pic from the beach. And ladies, taking 75 pics to get that juuuuuust right mirror selfie does not impress the guys. It may actually come across as self-absorbed.
Too many people
If you can’t figure out who it is you are supposed to be swiping on, that’s not a good sign. First of all, if it takes too long to figure out, the person is going to lose interest. Secondly, they may feel that you are hiding something by trying to blend in. And lastly, they are going to be looking at the hottest person in the picture. If you are not it, it’s not going to go well for you.
Don’t use super big sunglasses, hats, Big Gulps, or any other thing that hides your face. You may think it’s playful, mysterious or intriguing. However, most people figure that you are hiding something. One person recently told me, when talking about too-large sunglasses, “A lot can go wrong between the cheeks and forehead.” They are looking at dozens of pictures. If they can’t see what you are working with, they’ll swipe your “mysterious” pic left.
TOO many action adventure pics
You are not the Most Interesting (Wo)Man In The World. If all your pictures have you mountain biking, surfing, skydiving and underwater, it’s not going to come across the way you want. It will look like you are trying too hard, first off. Also, not everyone wants to try and keep up with that. You’re immediately disqualifying the “Netflix and chill” crowd. It’s okay to have one or two, but don’t overdo it.
If you see a fake tan, with that nice orange look to it, swipe left and keep going. There is so much wrong with a picture like this. Everyone can tell it’s fake and the fact that you think showing it is going to help is, well, not going to help you.
Too perfect a pic
Only duck face
Men should never be doing the duckface unless it’s your Howard the Duck impression. Just, don’t. For the ladies, men do not prefer you to be doing the duck face, but they know that *sigh* you’re going to do it anyway. Just don’t have every, single, picture, of you with the same expression.
No full body shot
If they have a couple of pictures up and no full body shot, flags should be a-wavin’. Hey, if you’ve got a little extra cushion, that’s okay. People aren’t perfectionists. Someone out there wants you for you. However, if there’s not one, people are going to be wondering what you’re hiding. Do you have all of your limbs? Do you have elephantiasis of the thighs? Don’t let people’s minds get carried away.
Now that we’ve highlighted what not to do, here’s some personal Tinder stories and tips from locals!
Stephanie – I have a love/hate relationship with Tinder. Years ago, when I first joined it, I joined it to meet people and just put myself out there dating wise. I’ve never used it as a hookup app. 3 years ago, I met my ex boyfriend on it and we dated for over a year. After my breakup, I swore I would never join it again and actually had anxiety over it. Long story short, I’m on it again as I feel like I’m finally ready to date but I don’t take the app very seriously. Many of the men on it are really immature.
Brian – My current fiancé and I met on Tinder about 3 years ago and dated for about 2.5 years before we got engaged in April 2017.
No Name – I’m a 26 year old Hispanic male working in finance. I’ve been in JC for a year now but just moved Downtown. I’m fairly new to Tinder. I decided to get rid of my car since I no longer need it, which limits my Tinder radius search. You pretty much have to live near a PATH stop for me to show any interest (unless you’re hot enough for me to pay $18 max for an Uber). Even close radius searches have tons of NY chicks. I prefer to stay local but if it’s a good enough match, I’ll make the trip to NY. I’ve been on several dates in Downtown JC. My go-to spot is Rolon’s Bar if she seems ratchet enough (which is a turn-on for me). If she’s a little more on the artsy/nerdy side, I’ll go to Barcade and show off my skills (or lack thereof). If she’s a club/party chick, I’ll suggest day drinking at Porta or maybe get there before the dancing gets lit, or hit Miss Wong’s. If she’s someone I can see potential in it actually going somewhere, I suggest Mexican food so we can have a good convo. Orale, if she’s really hot and I’m fresh off a paycheck, or Viva Mexico if I need to be a bit more fiscally responsible.
Ashley – At first, I went on Tinder with the purpose of meeting new people with absolutely no intent of getting into anything serious. The swiping right and left made me feel a sense of control. I had control of who I wanted to talk to or who I wanted nothing to do with, and a simple swipe did the job well done. Then I did the infamous swipe right on a man named Jimmy. To my surprise, we matched (meaning he swiped right FIRST). He contacted me and everything seemed super chill and not forced, so I gave him my number and we went to eat Mexican food. I purposely didn’t drink because remember, I didn’t want anything serious and a drink or two might give the wrong impression. After that night out, we continued to talk and went out a few more times until I noticed how me and this guy clicked. Nothing seemed forced, everything felt like it was supposed to happen the way it did. We started dating, and a year in a half later we are now engaged and planning a wedding. It was great! Tinder gave me the opportunity to meet my soulmate and best friend. Shoutout to Tinder!
Some tips I would give is to be open minded, don’t go in with any expectations (sometimes people go into dating apps, expecting to find love. Good things come when you least expect it.), and take your time swiping. You might swipe away a keeper!